"I am definitely listening. Yes, of course. Mm-hmm. I'm so sorry. No, you're right. It's very serious. I consider it to be quite serious. Of the utmost seriousness. No, I am not joking. Why would I joke about such a thing? I will definitely get that typo fixed before next week."
Texts from Father Joe: "We need to talk. POPE COMING."
"P.S. Tell no one. Fr Joe."